Sunday, March 6, 2016

Still Life with Robin: All Questions and No Answers

Photo by Ludo29, via Wikimedia Commons
by Peggy Robin

Too many times I have used this space to propose solutions to various problems in life, or advocate for this or that change. This time it’s different: here's a collection of a dozen questions, and no answers. But feel free to post any answers below, if you’ve got ‘em.

If Tarzan grew up in the jungle, raised by apes, why is he always clean-shaven?

Which came first, the Alphabet Song or Twinkle Twinkle Little Star?

If ghosts can float through walls, why don’t they float through the floor?

If you saw the endangered Florida panther stalking the endangered Florida Key deer, which one would you root for?

How is it that we put a man on the moon before we invented wheeled luggage?

Why was he called the “lone” ranger when he always had Tonto at his side?

What was Captain Hook’s name before he lost his hand?

If you blindfolded a chameleon and moved it from a brown to a green background, would it stay brown?

 When a mime is arrested, do the police still say, "You have the right to remain silent" ?

There are double A batteries, triple A batteries, and C batteries and D-cells….but what happened to the B’s?

If Wile E. Coyote could order all those gadgets from the Acme Company, why couldn’t he just order dinner?

If vampires can’t see themselves in the mirror, why is their hair always so perfect?

Still Life with Robin is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Saturdays...and occasionally (like today) on Sundays.


  1. Whoever does Jane's makeup is clearly shaving Tarzan.

    The Lone Ranger is called that (a) because Tonto is not a ranger or (b) for the same reason dictionaries not so long ago included "inhabited only by primitive natives" among the definitions of "uninhabited."

    The USSR did not beat the free world to an innovation in luggage technology (Chemodannik?) that had to be publicly surpassed.

    A B battery is like settling for silver in a gold medal game; if you're C, you won the bronze medal game.

    Ghosts don't float through the floor because they want you to see them coming.

    Vampires have neat hair because they don't keep fiddling with it in front of the mirror.

    Wile E. Coyote does not live near any good takeouts, you city slicker.

  2. Wow, you really DO have the answers! These are brilliant!