Dear Listserv Members,
We have received the following announcement from WMATA/Metro:
April 1, 2018
(Washington, D.C.) WMATA proudly unveils the first in its new program partnering with members of our Business Community to assign naming rights to Metro Stations.:
On the Red Line, the Cleveland Park Metro Station will become TARGET Cleveland Park. The rebranding of the station will take effect sometime in the Spring of 2019, when the new Target Store is expected to open in Sam’s Park’n’Shop in Cleveland Park. (See: https://dc.curbed.com/2018/2/27/17055020/target-cleveland-park-ivy-city-dc)
In the interim, the Cleveland Park Metro Station will close, so that the reconfiguration and other adjustments can take place. The old pylons displaying the station name “Cleveland Park” must be removed, and a new station-identifying object will be constructed, which will consist of a very large version of the familiar red Target logo, with the new station name in red and white lettering, going in a circle around the logo/station marker. The height of the station-identifying object will be the same as the current pylon, and being circular, will have a diameter equal to its height.
The west entrance to the station will be closed permanently, and the east entrance on Connecticut Avenue, mid-block between Porter and Ordway Streets NW, will be accessed directly through the Target store, so that all Metro riders must enter and exit directly through the lower level of the store. The reconstruction of the new Target-centered escalator and elevator will take approximately one year, necessitating the closing of the station during that period of time. Metro regrets the inconvenience.
You can view the new TARGET Cleveland Park Station logo, as well as building plans for the redesigned, relocated escalator and elevator here: http://bit.ly/cplforapr1
When the new TARGET Cleveland Park Metro station reopens in the spring of 2019, WMATA and Target will stage a Grand Reopening for all patrons in the neighborhood, city officials, and other dignitaries. There will be live entertainment, free Metro safety stickers, a balloon artist, free Metro refrigerator magnets, and more. Other Metro branded merchandise will be available for purchase.
After the TARGET Cleveland Park Station rebranding project is completed, the next Metro station to be renamed and redesigned will be Federal Triangle; the naming rights have been acquired by the Trump International Hotel. The station will become The Trump International Make Metro Great Again Station. The station will be closed while the access in and out of the station is reconfigured so that all passenger will pass through the hotel’s lower lobby. There will be a $5.00 surcharge upon every entry and exit, for customer use of the marble-floored corridors, the gold banisters, or the mahogany-paneled elevator.
In the event that Amazon locates its second national headquarters in the Washington Metro area, it will be automatically be given naming rights to the entire Metro system, which will drop WMATA to become AMATA - Amazon Metro Area Transit Authority. However, if this change does take place, NO stations will be closed during the transition, and the entire system will be revamped, and every passenger who is a member of Amazon Prime will be assured of prompt delivery to his or her destination within the promised time period or the fare will automatically be refunded instantly to the customer’s Amazon Prime account. (This policy will not apply to non-members of Amazon Prime.) You can read more about how the Amazon-run Metro system would function by accessing the AMATA proposal, available here: http://bit.ly/cplforapr1
To comment on any of these proposed changes, visit us online at:
http://bit.ly/cplforapr1
###
We have received the following announcement from WMATA/Metro:
April 1, 2018
Metro System Station Rebranding Program Announces First Renamed Station:
TARGET Cleveland Park
 |
| Photo by Bill Adler |
On the Red Line, the Cleveland Park Metro Station will become TARGET Cleveland Park. The rebranding of the station will take effect sometime in the Spring of 2019, when the new Target Store is expected to open in Sam’s Park’n’Shop in Cleveland Park. (See: https://dc.curbed.com/2018/2/27/17055020/target-cleveland-park-ivy-city-dc)
In the interim, the Cleveland Park Metro Station will close, so that the reconfiguration and other adjustments can take place. The old pylons displaying the station name “Cleveland Park” must be removed, and a new station-identifying object will be constructed, which will consist of a very large version of the familiar red Target logo, with the new station name in red and white lettering, going in a circle around the logo/station marker. The height of the station-identifying object will be the same as the current pylon, and being circular, will have a diameter equal to its height.
The west entrance to the station will be closed permanently, and the east entrance on Connecticut Avenue, mid-block between Porter and Ordway Streets NW, will be accessed directly through the Target store, so that all Metro riders must enter and exit directly through the lower level of the store. The reconstruction of the new Target-centered escalator and elevator will take approximately one year, necessitating the closing of the station during that period of time. Metro regrets the inconvenience.
You can view the new TARGET Cleveland Park Station logo, as well as building plans for the redesigned, relocated escalator and elevator here: http://bit.ly/cplforapr1
When the new TARGET Cleveland Park Metro station reopens in the spring of 2019, WMATA and Target will stage a Grand Reopening for all patrons in the neighborhood, city officials, and other dignitaries. There will be live entertainment, free Metro safety stickers, a balloon artist, free Metro refrigerator magnets, and more. Other Metro branded merchandise will be available for purchase.
After the TARGET Cleveland Park Station rebranding project is completed, the next Metro station to be renamed and redesigned will be Federal Triangle; the naming rights have been acquired by the Trump International Hotel. The station will become The Trump International Make Metro Great Again Station. The station will be closed while the access in and out of the station is reconfigured so that all passenger will pass through the hotel’s lower lobby. There will be a $5.00 surcharge upon every entry and exit, for customer use of the marble-floored corridors, the gold banisters, or the mahogany-paneled elevator.
In the event that Amazon locates its second national headquarters in the Washington Metro area, it will be automatically be given naming rights to the entire Metro system, which will drop WMATA to become AMATA - Amazon Metro Area Transit Authority. However, if this change does take place, NO stations will be closed during the transition, and the entire system will be revamped, and every passenger who is a member of Amazon Prime will be assured of prompt delivery to his or her destination within the promised time period or the fare will automatically be refunded instantly to the customer’s Amazon Prime account. (This policy will not apply to non-members of Amazon Prime.) You can read more about how the Amazon-run Metro system would function by accessing the AMATA proposal, available here: http://bit.ly/cplforapr1
To comment on any of these proposed changes, visit us online at:
http://bit.ly/cplforapr1
###
Dear Peggy and Bill,
ReplyDeleteI am horrified at this news. What can we do to stop it? And what happened to our initiative to have the Metro Station named ROBIN-ADLER Cleveland Park? Or at least Cleveland Park LISTSERV?
A Deeply Concerned Citizen
No, no….would never want a Metro Station in our name unless they can actually keep the escalators running normally and catch up on those 40+ years of deferred maintenance. On the other hand, Yahoogroups is run like a leaky old bucket….so maybe it is fitting!
DeleteThanks for writing!
A Frequently Disgruntled Metro Passenger
This isn't quite right. The new station name will be TARGET-ClePa. "ClePa" is the new, hip moniker for Cleveland Park, erasing our fuddy-duddy identity and mimicking trendy neighborhoods like NoMa, AdMo, Soho, etc.
ReplyDeleteMetro is not that hip! Yes, there is a Noma-Gallaudet U Station, but in general, the strategy is not to make the names trendy but to overload them with location descriptors, making the station name as long as possible. So one of the rebranding choices on the table is to partner with the Washington Post to redo MacPherson Square. They would construct a new entrance to the at Franklin Square in front of the Post’s new address, One Franklin Square, and then rename the station “The Washington Post Democracy Dies In Darkness Franklin Square/MacPherson Square Station.”
DeleteBut only if Bezos is not forced to sell the paper after the Trump’s new taxes targeted at Amazon cause Amazon’s stock price to tank and he loses his entire fortune!
Happy April 1!
-Peggy
Well, I work near the Union Station-U.S. Senate-Postal Museum-BLS-Gonzaga-CBPP-CNN "Not Fake News" stop, so I thoroughly approve of McPherson's new moniker. Happy April 1!
DeleteBrilliant, as always. You’re the reason I rush to email every April 1st (hoping to learn of a successful loof lirpa breeding program, I admit).
ReplyDelete-Mark
Loved today's WMATA Story!!
ReplyDeleteHappy Lirpa Sloof Day!
This year's may be the best yet. Thank you...we needed that.
ReplyDeleteA good one, Peggy. But a scary possibility!
ReplyDeleteI did not entirely make this one up! Metro has been threatening for years to let corporate sponsors add their names to certain Metro stations, for enough $$$. It could happen!
DeleteHappy April 1!
Well done! I needed a laugh this morning.
ReplyDeleteIs this an April Fools Day joke?
ReplyDeleteYep...been doing it since 2006! See the complete 12-piece set here:
Deletehttp://bit.ly/cplforapr1
I wondered what you were going to come up with this year.
ReplyDeleteYou nailed it again.
Could be prophetic you know.
Think Verizon Center, FedEx Field, etcetera
That's just what I'm worried about! I would't put it past them for a minute...
Delete