Ask Kelli: Avoiding Smoke, Collecting on a Debt, Finding a Work-at-Home Job

by Kelli Miller

Dear Kelli,

My mother-in-law is 66 and a chronic smoker. I don’t want her to smoke around my kids. What is the polite way to say, “You can see your grandkids only if you don’t smoke?”

Signed,
Loud and Clear

Dear Loud and Clear,

You absolutely have a right to tell your mother-in-law she can’t see your kids if she smokes. But I believe this is a job for your husband. (It’s his job to manage the problems in his family). So if he’s agrees, I’d let him read what I’m about to write below. If not, feel free to say this yourself.

“Mom, we love having you around and you know the kids absolutely adore you. But we want them to be as healthy as possible. And that includes being in an environment that is smoke-free. We want you to see the kids as much as you want, but we need you to see them when you are not smoking or have just smoked. And that includes not smoking with them when you are outside. I could list the potential health problems second-hand smoke causes, but I know you already know it. Thank you for understanding.”

Stand strong on this policy and she will abide by it if she cares enough about her grandkids.

All the best,
Kelli
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Dear Kelli,

I did some car repairs for a friend. It was a lot of labor and included parts. I told the friend I’d just charge him for the parts, not the labor. It came to about $600. It’s been two months and I have yet to see a check. I’m annoyed, obviously, because I did the work for free and he agreed to pay for the parts. Should I say something or realize I’ll never see that money?

Signed,
No More Freebies


Dear No More Freebies,

I believe you should absolutely say something. You worked hard, you laid out the money, and you had an agreement with your friend. So I think you can go about this in either of two ways:

1) “Hey Tom. I just got my bill for the parts I ordered for your car. It came to $600.” (Then give him another week. If he still doesn’t pay, go to the next option.

2) “Tom, I consider you a friend and that’s why I did the labor on your car for free. But I don’t have the money to pay for your parts. We agreed you’d pay me back and I still haven’t seen the money. I don’t want to think I misjudged you as a person who doesn’t pay people back. I know you appreciate what I’ve done and you can show me that by paying me back for the parts.”

If he still doesn’t pay after that, consider taking him to small claims court.

Good luck,
Kelli
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Dear Kelli,

Any ideas on how to make money from home that don’t take up a lot of time?

Signed,
Need Some Dough!

Dear Need Some Dough!

Yes. It starts in your own home. Start collecting all that stuff you don’t use, want, or need. Then have a garage sale or start selling on Craigslist or Ebay. You get to de-clutter and make some extra cash at the same time.

Other ideas include:

1) Sign up for online surveys (at surveyclub.com).
2) Do transcribing or dictation for people or companies (onlinetranscriptionservices.org)
3) Become a home-based customer service rep (workathomedesk.com)
4) Look for freelance opportunities (elance.com or odesk.com)
5) Work as an online expert in your field (liveperson.com)

All the best,
Kelli

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Kelli Miller, MSW is a therapist, author, and radio personality. Miller was a featured expert for SIRIUS Satellite Radio Channel 198, the co-host for the TV show Love and Money: The Advice Show, and the advice columnist for Playboy U, and the author of Professor Kelli’s Guide to Finding a Husband. Ask Kelli is published on All Life is Local and the Cleveland Park Listserv on Wednesdays.

Kelli welcomes your comments below.  Have a question? You can write to Kelli at advice (at) fastmail (dot) net or via Twitter @askkelli.Your name and email address will be kept confidential.