Showing posts with label Stay In!. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Stay In!. Show all posts

Thursday, August 6, 2020

Stay In! And Stay Safe from Hurricanes and Tropical Storms

by Peggy Robin

This week's "Stay In! Column" arrives too late to warn you about protecting yourself from Hurricane Isaias.* (See the footnote for pronunciation). When I turned the "Get Out" column into the "Stay In" column back in March, when the pandemic began shutting down all group activities, my thought was to use the column to highlight all the things you could do at home and not go stir crazy, while you were protecting yourself and others from the spread of the virus.

Now that we’re in the thick of hurricane season, this Stay In column for this week is about another kind of shelter-in-place – the protective behavior we need to put into practice every year during the hurricane season, which runs from June 1 to November 30.

Isaias makes landfall

Just as so many of us have learned the hard way how risky it can be not to strictly observe social distancing and wear protection against the coromavirus, every years thousands experience the catastrophic consequences of not taking a hurricane forecast seriously. 

Here's a photo round-up of storm damage and flooding around the District, Maryland, and Virginia:

In Queens, a man sitting in a parked car was killed by a falling tree:

The National Weather Center is warning us that 2020 may be the most active hurricane season ever. We've already had nine named hurricanes or tropical storms - the most ever this early in the season. The next named hurricane or tropical storm will be Josephine. Before the next one comes around, you should review the rules to protect yourself and your family. They're actually a lot simpler than the rules about protecting yourself from the pandemic....but they're somewhat similar, in that they call for people to stay in and avoid doing anything known to be risky:

1. Pay attention to the weather forecast.
2. Secure any loose items outside before the storm comes in.
3. Have supplies on hand in case of loss of power.
4. Once the bad weather starts, stay in!
5. If you driving when the storm comes through and you encounter water covering the roadway, do NOT assume you can drive through it safely. Turn around and get to safety.
6. After the storm, stay away from downed power lines. Report them immediately.

Here's a storm preparedness guide from Pepco, with all of the above advice:

And if anyone needs a reminder why the Cleveland Park Metro has to be closed whenever heavy rains/flash flooding is predicted, here's the video from 2016 showing what can happen when it floods: 

Scroll down to the second video on the site for the really dramatic time lapse footage.

Thanks to the Popville blog for the look back....and no, those drainage problems have NOT been fixed!
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* If you have been wondering if you're pronouncing the Hurricane's name correctly, you can listen to an audio of it on CNN: https://www.cnn.com/2020/08/01/weather/hurricane-isaias-how-to-pronounce-trnd/index.html. If you don't want to bother to click on the link, then just say, "Ees - ah - ee - yas."
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The Stay In! (formerly known as the Get Out! Events Column is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays. 

Thursday, July 23, 2020

Get Out! Or Stay In! See the Zoo Either Way

Photo by Smithsonian National Zoo

by Peggy Robin


If you’ve been missing the animals and you are up for a masked and socially distanced visit with them, you can find all the instructions you need to arrange your outing at  https://nationalzoo.si.edu/visit/welcome-back-zoo.

Get your timed entry passes (walk-in or drive-and-park) here:

You might be pleased and surprised to learn that the animals have been missing you, too. Well, maybe just a few of the more social ones. Read this City Paper article to find out which ones: https://bit.ly/2ZUEP8K – but it’s no big spoiler to reveal that the cats at the zoo (of all sizes) do NOT really care if you show up or not. Still, you may be surprised to learn there are some animals that crave an audience.

However, if you think you are one of those who would be better off waiting a while longer before spending time at a place that attracts visitors from far and wide – even though everyone there will be masked and kept at a safe distance –you can still see the animals at the National Zoo….on the internet. 

Here’s an option that’s been here all along: Zoo-Cams! Click on the links below and to check in on our  camera-ready stars: (with supplementary material to liven things up, in case there's not much happening on the live-cam).

1. Giant Panda Cam. Pandas are number one in popularity at the zoo. And here’s some lively background music for you while you watch:

2. Naked Mole-rat Cam. Mole-rats are a specialized taste, to my way of thinking. If you pop in on the the naked mole rat world and find there’s not much going on at the moment, you can watch this video that provides a much more action-packed view of their lives: https://bit.ly/3ht5KhU  

3. Lion Cam. As City Paper noted, the big cats have NOT missed you! Here’s a soundtrack to go with the Lion cam: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQlByoPdG6c

4. Elephant Cam. These marching Disney cartoon elephants might just trump the real thing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrQQZuLru9s)

5. Black-footed Ferret Cam. Are you a ferret fan? Do you know who isn’t? Former NYC Mayor Rudy Giuliani, that's who! If you’ve never heard his unhinged anti-ferret rant, now hear this!

Of course, the trouble with cyberspace is that once you get used to seeing things in VR that can easily top what you can see IRL, you start expecting too much. You want to watch a panda do more than sleep or chew bamboo? Wish you could actually pick up one of those cheetah cubs? And wouldn't it be great if those kittens could talk! When you start thinking along those lines, that's when you get the urge to hop over to Youtube and look for talking animals. And not just parrots! How about a cat who says NO!

Here you go:

And now a whole clip-reel full of non-humans saying and doing some unexpected things:

And now a song to play us out from dear old Rex Harrison as Dr. Doolittle, singing, "If I Could Talk to the Animals":
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The "Get Out!" or "Stay In!" column is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays.

Thursday, July 16, 2020

Get Out! And Watch Comet NeoWise


Neowise over Stonehenge (NASA)
by Peggy Robin

Finally, something safe you can do outside with the family! All you need is a clear field - best to find one far away from the city lights and any trees or houses that would block the horizon. Oh, and you need a cloudless night. But you don't really need a telescope. A good pair of binoculars will be fine.
 
 
It's Comet Neowise!
 
Watch this 2 minute and 12 second video from the Capital Weather Gang and you will be all set to catch a view of the comet about 45 minutes after sunset in the northwest sky on the next clear night:  https://wapo.st/2CtbJEn   
 
The best night could be July 22, the point at which it passes closest to earth. But you have until the end of this month to see it. You don't want to wait too long.....or you will have to wait another 6,800 years until it comes back around this way again.
 
Don't you love that mystical name NEOWISE? It's actually an acronym for "Near-Earth Objects Wide-field Infrared Survey Explorer" - that's the name of the instrument that first spotted the comet.
 
Want to know more about NEOWISE? Go to the Space.com blog for some higher level space-nerd talk and technical detail: 
https://www.space.com/comet-neowise-visible-evening-sky-july-2020.html
 
Want a lower level of talk, including some of the cultural baggage surrounding comets - the superstitions, myths, and historical gossip? Comets have long been taken as heavenly heralds. Or harbingers of doom. But  the meaning of the comet all depends on which side of the battle you're on. When Halley's comet appeared in the sky before the Battle of Hastings in 1066, William the Conqueror, who was to defeat the Anglo-Saxon armies and be crowned King of England, took the comet as God's promise of his victory. You can see the depiction of the comet in the Bayeaux Tapestry, commissioned by William to publicize his side of the story. But for the English and their king, Harold, slain on the battlefield, that comet was most definitely a sign of BAD times.
 
You can read more about comets in history and culture at  https://www.mpg.de/research/comets-cultural-history
 
As for the portents signified by Comet Neowise now......???? 
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The "Get Out!" column (or its alternate, the "Stay In!" column) is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays.

Thursday, July 9, 2020

Stay In! And Watch Hamilton!

by Peggy Robin


It’s another “Stay In!” column. We’re still not ready for a “Get Out!” listing of events taking place IRL. So it’s yet another week of recommendations of things to do cyberspace. Today’ it's just one thing: Watch Hamilton!

It was supposed to be here at the Kennedy Center all summer long…..and you don’t need me to tell you it’s not here, and there’s still no date for the postponed show dates, either.  But that doesn’t mean you can’t watch it. You can….on the Disney Channel. It will cost you $6.99 and you will get to watch the original cast, Lin Manuel Miranda, Leslie Odom Jr., Daveed Diggs, Philippa Soo, Jonathan Groff, et al., playing their original parts on stage. If you have a big-screen TV, well, it’s still not like watching them perform live in a theater….but for 7 bucks (as opposed to $300 or more), it’s not a bad deal.

To get Hamilton at that price, you will need to sign up for the Disney channel -- and if you're not a fan of other productions of  "The Mouse" (as embittered former Disney employees sometimes called the company), you must remember to cancel as soon as your first month is done. There's no refund for a partial month's use. Disney used to give a seven-day free trial, but that ended before Hamilton was on offer. Disney's betting on keeping a lot of the new subscribers who signed on just for Hamilton, but might stay to have access to the old classics like Dumbo and Pinocchio, and other treasures in the Disney trove. 

There's more about Hamilton on the Disney Channel, including a preview and a spoiler-laden review at CNET.com: https://www.cnet.com/reviews/disney-plus-review/

The CNET article includes a link to sign up, or you can go directly to Disney Plus and click on "sign up": www.disneyplus.com

You don't wanna miss your shot!
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The Stay In! column is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and All Life Is Local on Thursdays. 

Thursday, July 2, 2020

Get Out! ....On Second Thought, Stay In! For the Fourth of July

Wikimedia Creative Commons

by Peggy Robin

Normally, my "Get Out!" column on the Thursday before the Fourth of July would spell out the holiday details for you, giving helpful tips about attendance at the festivities on the National Mall – you know, Metro schedule changes, street closings, parade times, entry checkpoint locations, and more.

This time, you’re on your own. These are NOT normal times, and instead of saying “Get out and enjoy the fireworks," I’m saying, "Better to be safe and stay home." It doesn't matter how protective your mask is -- you'll still be at increased risk as you pass through one of a few narrow checkpoints, where thousands of other people –any one of whom could be a "super-spreader"– will have passed through before you. 

Once you are inside the secure area, you may lay down your picnic blanket and stake out a buffer zone well over six feet away from any other visitor group – but how will you maintain it? There are bound to be troupes of teenagers, or college kids, or beer buddies, or any number of other odd collections of humanity, who will pass your way, carelessly invading your safety perimeter. And you can bet they will be wearing their masks down around their chins -- that's if they haven't removed them entirely. Be prepared to yell at them....although that will most likely result in people yelling right back at you -- and yelling, as we know, is a prime way that airborne droplets can fly the farthest. 

Why expose yourself? You are not going to have a good time.

Now, I have always loved a well-choreographed fireworks display, and I know that the TV screen can't capture the sensations of being there on the ground -- but this year you have got to contemplate much more than a half an hour of splendor while the night sky is lit up with cascades of colorful sparks -- waterfalls, haloes and starbursts. This year the experience you need to contemplate at length is what it would feel like to be hooked up to a ventilator -- and that would be something lasting far longer than that half-hour of fireworks you enjoyed. Not a worthwhile trade-off for anyone, to my mind. 

Still, if you are bound and determined not to miss the annual event, let me send you to this article in Washingtonian, which will tell you what you need to know to attend:
https://www.washingtonian.com/2020/07/01/finally-some-more-details-about-dcs-fourth-of-july/. Once you've read that, you might also want to read this piece in DCist about the show, which includes some sage advice from Mayor Bowser, urging DC residents to stay home:  https://dcist.com/story/20/06/25/july-4-dc-fireworks-bowser-stay-home-coronavirus/

Oh, and just one more thing about this year's holiday, that needs to be noted. Even if you do stay home, you are bound to experience all the noise of a live fireworks display – and it will doubtless go on for hours. That’s because – for reasons I can’t begin to fathom – lots of kids and maybe even some adults, have been setting off fireworks, doing it every night, for the past several weeks. On the fourth of July, they’re bound to be out in larger numbers than ever, in every neighborhood of the city, and the bangs and pops may go on till dawn. The Washington Post reported on this problem – see  https://wapo.st/2ZyqRIe –  but it's not just here  in DC; in every major city, people are setting off fireworks, night after night, with no sign of stopping (see https://bit.ly/2BnEUZl). 

Here's hoping that the official fireworks holiday on the Fourth will serve as the grande finale of all this ear-shattering uproar. But given the way that things are trending these days, I have to tell you, I am not optimistic.

Even so, I wish you and yours a safe, healthy, and if at all possible, peaceful Fourth of July.

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The Get Out!/Stay In! column is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays.  

Thursday, June 18, 2020

Stay In! And Celebrate Juneteenth

by Peggy Robin 

Tomorrow, June 19th, is Juneteenth, and unless you’ve been hidden away in a cave for the last month, you’ve learned that this date is a celebration of the end of slavery in the US -- a holiday or an official observance in 47 of the 50 states plus the District of Columbia.

When President Trump announced that he would be holding a political rally for his campaign in Tulsa on that historic date, there came such an outcry of protest from all across the political spectrum -- even from Republicans -- that in a rare reversal, Trump postponed the event for a day, pushing it forward to the 20th... but still set to take place in Tulsa, Oklahoma, the site of the largest and most horrific massacre of African Americans by a white mob ever to take place on American soil.

You may not have been taught about Juneteenth in your American history class. Your American history textbook may have informed you that January 1, 1863 was when the Emancipation Proclamation was issued – and your teacher might even have explained that this meant that the slaves were free. It didn’t. The Emancipation Proclamation applied only to enslaved persons in the South in areas under Union control – and Union troops at that point in the war were not doing so well. Even after the Civil War ended with General Lee’s surrender at Appomatox courthouse on April 9, 1865, slavery persisted in the US. Juneteenth marks the date - June 19, 1865 - of the arrival of Union troops to the (then) geographically isolated, remote state of Texas, and these Union forces were finally able to enforce the Emancipation Proclamation that Lincoln had declared more than two years before. About 250,000 enslaved persons in Texas became free -- two months and ten days AFTER the end of the Civil War.   

So Juneteenth reminds us that it’s not what’s in a proclamation or a law that brings about change; it matters whether the laws are enforced – equally and fairly – that makes the difference between slavery and freedom, justice and injustice. It’s a question of who’s there to do the enforcing, too. That’s something we’re still working on till this day….and something to demand on this Juneteenth of 2020.  

To learn more about Juneteenth and take part in DC Public Library’s virtual Juneteenth celebration, visit: https://www.dclibrary.org/node/67189   

To learn more about local marches, protests, observances, and educational sessions taking place in and around DC this weekend, go to: https://dcist.com/story/20/06/16/juneteenth-black-lives-matter-protest-rallies-dc-md-va/ and also: https://www.washingtonian.com/2020/06/18/these-are-the-dc-protests-and-virtual-events-commemorating-juneteenth/

For everybody's well-being, please remember to wear your mask and observe social distancing!

Have a safe and meaningful Juneteenth!
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The Stay In! column (formerly known as the "Get Out!" events column) is published on All Life Is Local and the Cleveland Park Listserv on Thursdays.

Thursday, June 11, 2020

Stay In! Waiting for the Return of the "Get Out!" Events Column

by Peggy Robin

Now that DC is slowly opening up again, the question on the table is "When will the 'Get Out!' events column return?

Short answer: Not yet. Too soon.

Long answer: When the number of IRL events taking place in Cleveland Park or any of the adjacent neighborhoods is greater than ten.

Alternate answer (and probably a more accurate indicator): Whenever the DC Public Library system begins to host events, not online, but real, indoor events at the Cleveland Park Branch, the Tenley Branch, and/or the Chevy Chase Branch. I will be periodically checking in with the DCPL's calendar of events at https://www.dclibrary.org/calendar to see when the word "virtual" no longer appears in front of each calendar entry. When in-person meetings are again a reality, the "Get Out" column will again appear in this space.

If  the open-for-business public library building becomes the standard, then it will function as our "Waffle House Index" for the state of the pandemic. You may recall the formulation by the former head of FEMA, Craig Fugate, who once judged the severity of a tornado according to this trenchant observation: "If you get there and the Waffle House is closed -- that's really bad."  See  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Waffle_House_Index for the full explication of the term "Waffle House Index.")

While we are on the subject of DCPL, I'd like to pay (overdue) tribute to all the librarians and staff workers who have been holding down the fort during the pandemic. While unable to host any of the myriad of book groups, lectures, workshops, film screenings, help sessions, and so much more that went on inside library meeting rooms, they have done an incredible job of moving events into the virtual world, keeping the information flowing freely.

When IRL meetings become possible again, I'm looking forward to a return to the high level of public events -- always free and open to all -- that had existed BC (Before Coronovirus). And when you are at last able to go back inside your local public library, you will find they have done away with library fines, too!

Not sure when that will be, but the "Get Out!" events column will be back that week, and will begin with a big Hurrah! So stay tuned to this space....
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The "Stay In" column is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays.

Thursday, June 4, 2020

Stay In! And Vote by Mail....Or Not


by Peggy Robin

Well, friends, I did what voters were advised to do during a pandemic: I voted by absentee ballot. But now I wish I hadn’t.

Don’t get me wrong – I am happy not to have been among the voters queued up to vote at one of the voting centers on primary election day on Tuesday. I saw the news photos the next day of voters in two-and-three hour lines. Or worse. That wouldn’t be the way I’d want to exercise my franchise. I suppose with the benefit of 20/20 hindsight (or call it 6/2/2020 hindsight), I would have gone to an early voting center and cast my vote in person. I understand that social distancing was well maintained. The process was smooth and people got their “I voted” stickers – and here’s the important part – they also were handed a receipt proving that their ballot was cast.

That’s what I did NOT get.

Here’s how it went: Almost as soon as DC voting officials and get-out-the-vote volunteers starting urging voters to vote by mail (as in this CP Listserv message #157141, posted on April 24), I sent in my absentee ballot request. I received it in the mail in a timely way. I carefully followed the instructions to mark my ballot, place it in the inner privacy envelope, sign and date where required on the outer envelope, and mail it back by the June 2, 2020 deadline.

On May 22, 2020, I walked the ballot down to the Cleveland Park Post Office and put it in the outside mailbox at the curb in time for the 5:00 PM mail pickup.

I considered going inside to have it officially received by a clerk and get a tracking receipt – but on principle that voting should be free, I decided against it, to avoid the tracking fee.

Now here’s the problem. When I go to the DC Board of Elections ballot tracking webpage at https://www.dcboe.org/Voters/Absentee-Voting/Track-Absentee-Ballot, I can find my ballot without trouble, and I can see what date it was mailed out – but in the “Date Received” box, where it should say when they logged my ballot in so that it could be counted…..it says “Not Available.” And it’s now two days AFTER the election.

Not that anything crucial is hanging on my vote in this primary...but still, I voted, damn it! I have the “I voted” sticker that was included along with the absentee ballot and the instruction sheet. Still, I have no assurance that anyone down at BOE knows I voted.

May 22 is far enough away from June 2 for one to reasonably assume the thing would have made it through the US Mail and into the DC BOE system…..yet here I am, wondering if my vote has been counted – or whether it will ever be counted.

That’s not a worry any voter is supposed to have in a functioning democracy.

So what’s the take-away here? Is it, Door #1: We don’t really have a fully functioning democracy right now, due to a worldwide pandemic and nationwide social upheaval. Or Door #2: Well, large bureaucracies mess things up sometimes. It’s a glitch, that’s all.

Whether it’s #1 (very serious problem) or #2 (not so serious --a one-off problem), I know what I will do next time around…. and it’s not going to be a mail-in vote. Come November, I’ll opt for the early in-person voting. That way, I can watch as my voted ballot slips out of the privacy sleeve directly into the locked ballot box. A friendly, independent poll worker will observe my action to be sure I have put in my ballot the right way. When I am done, the poll worker will hand me my “I voted” sticker and a receipt, showing that my ballot was number XXXX received at that polling place.

Still, I worry that other voters may lose confidence in the system and take Door #3 – the just-sit-at-home-and-don’t-bother-to-vote option.

-Signed,
Former Absentee Voter

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The "Stay In!" column (formerly the "Get Out!" events column) is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays.

Thursday, May 28, 2020

Stay In! Happy 100th Birthday to Arthur Rowse



by Peggy Robin 

One of these days, the "Stay In!" column will go back to its previous life as the "Get Out!" events column. Until that time, I'm highlighting events that can be celebrated without a real-life gathering -- and in this case, I've chosen one that occurred about a month ago, on April 30th. I may be a few weeks behind (well, who hasn't felt time is out of joint, under the present circumstances?), but I'm still happy to take this opportunity to say Happy 100th birthday, Arthur Rowse!

The Centenarian in question is a former Cleveland Parker and current resident of Chevy Chase, MD, who is not only a distinguished journalist, author, and World War II veteran, but he is the father of Mary Rowse, the founder/showrunner of the Chevy Chase Community Listserv, https://groups.io/g/ChevyChaseCommunity.

I would write more about Arthur Rowse and his illustrious life – but I’d much rather let him do that in his own words. On May 23, 2020, Arthur Rowse published this op-ed piece in the New York Times, and after you read it, I am sure you will join me sending him congratulations on this milestone event.

It’s My 100th Birthday. It’s Been Quite a Century.
[go to https://nyti.ms/2TPhYrE if the long link above is broken].
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"Stay In!" is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays. 

Thursday, May 21, 2020

Stay In! Unsubscribe-O-Rama

by Peggy Robin


People ask me how I’m spending my free time during the coronavirus lockdown. I will tell you: what little free time I have is taken up with the task of un-subscribing from all the email blasts I never signed up to receive. This activity feels like it’s become a new part-time job. You know I’m spending all day on my computer anyway, now that the listserv is running at double-time, due to the coronoavirus pandemic, but on top of the daily torrent of listserv submissions, there’s a daily deluge of messages urgently seeking my support for everyone everywhere in need.

Let me be clear: I’m not talking about spam. I’m talking about worthy, often wonderful organizations that I wholeheartedly support. These are organizations that are feeding people after hurricanes, and are doing so here and now, for people who’ve lost their jobs due to coronavirus. They’re working for political equality, or trying to free reporters locked up abroad, or they want to end voter suppression or reverse the injustices of mass incarceration. Dear Peggy, they write, we need your help at this moment in history. You see, they're all on a first name basis with me – especially the political candidates. And they think I’m on a first name basis with them. But I’m feeling less and less friendly, given all the extra time they're making me spend each day, going delete, delete, delete.

Now I admit, I gave these organizations and candidates my email address voluntarily, usually when I contributed a bit of money. So I can’t say that I never wanted them to contact me. Just not every single day of the year. And some of them do it two or three times a day, every day. And when I get up in the morning, I see more's come in overnight. They never sleep.

When I realize I’m spending too much time per day deleting the same email from the same organization, that’s when finally hit the unsubscribe link. You might think this would take all of five seconds. But no. You have to scroll down, down, down, to the very end of the long pitch letter, and then find the teeny-tiny type that says “unsubscribe.” You click it, but you’re still not done. You may need to figure out which of your several email addresses is the one they’ve got you under, and confirm that’s the one you want taken off their list.  Before they let you go, they may badger you to answer some questions, tell them why you want out. 

The really insidious trick is to offer to send you less email. I’ve fallen for that one any number of times. They say they’ll cut way back, and I believe them, and so I don’t quit entirely. Then, for the next few days, maybe even a few weeks, the flood goes down to a trickle. Maybe just one a week. That’s OK, I can live with that. But it never stays that way. I put it out of my mind for a time, and so I don’t notice that it's slowly, slowly creeping back up again. The day comes around when I’m deleted a bunch of emails, and I think to myself, haven’t I unsubscribed from this list already? Or maybe I asked them to cut back? I can't remember, and I'm not keeping records to check. That would be even more time-consuming than going through the unsubscribe process again. So I find myself clicking the unsubscribe link again, for the same organization.

On top of all this, unsubscribing doesn’t always work. A lot of the time, the email just keeps coming. without a break. Or maybe they do unsubscribe me for a short time, and then they buy the maling list from a similar organization, and there's my email address again. 

I already know what advice I will get from my wise readers out there. Don’t give them your real email address, you goose! Use a disposable email address -- get yourself a whole slew of them that you can create on the fly, each time you donate to an organization or support a candidate. Yes, I’ve heard that advice many times. But the thing is, when I first give to the organization, I do want to hear from them. I want an acknowledgement that they’ve received my donation. I need a tax receipt for the IRS. I do want to know what they’re up to and learn if they are making a difference. So I don’t want to be totally out of the loop. I just don’t want to be so in the loop that my inbox is overflowing, and I'm left feeling that I’ve been thrown for a loop.

Is there a happy medium? I haven’t found it yet, but if anyone out there has got a working solution that doesn’t involve any of the following: a) disposable email addresses; b) never giving any money to any charities, cause organizations or candidates for office; or c) going off to live in a cave somewhere far off the grid – by all means email me. I won't delete your message!

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The Stay In! column is published on the Cleveland ParkListserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays.

Thursday, May 14, 2020

Stay In! And Learn Some New Vocabulary!

Merriam Webster's "Words We're Watching": Infodemic

by Peggy Robin


In this new quarantined world we inhabit, we need some new vocabulary to describe what we’re seeing and doing. We are an inventive species, and if many of us are not going to work as usual, we can sit around at home coming up with ways to occupy ourselves, and then we must create new terms to describe our activities and thoughts. Some of them are actually useful, and others….not so much, but perhaps amusing (?). You be the judge:  

Quarancleaning. It’s what millions of homebound people are doing with their time – cleaning out closets, donating outgrown clothing and unneeded furniture, ecycling their outmoded electronics, and reducing the clutter in the spaces where they now live, work, play, and home-school their children, as well as eat and sleep. 

Disastertising. You know a disastertisement when you hear that voiceover, rich in the tones of deep concern, conveying the company’s commitment to the greater good in this time of crisis, and making sure you know just how much they care. We are stronger and better, we are reassured, due in no small measure to the company's warm, comforting pizza delivery, or their stepped-up production of toilet paper, or their reduced rates on your car insurance. Some companies honed their skill at disastertising during Hurricane Katrina or Superstorm Sandy. But the all-time undisputed master of disasterizing is BP oil, which, after having caused the oil spill that left the Gulf Coast despoiled for years on end, spent millions on commercials to tell you how hard they were working to make things come back even better than before. Never even a nod to any of the company's violations of safety or environmental rules that led to the catastrophe in the first place. Want to know more about the phenomenon of disasterising? Bob Garfield of "On the Media" explains it all for you in an entertaining but at the same time, depressing, podcast, “The Art of Disasterising”: https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/otm/episodes/art-disastertising-on-the-media 

Coronacation
. It’s like a staycation, except it’s not by choice. You are staying home during your time off work due to the coronavirus lockdown -- not because you thought it would be more relaxing or more economical to forgo travel to some far-flung, exotic isle, but because you must. Many people used to look forward to a staycation as a chance to unwind, to appreciate the tourist attractions in their own hometown, or just have a little quiet time at home to devote to their own interests. Hard to gin up the same sort of enthusiasm when the reason you’re not straying beyond your front door is that you don't know what dangerous particles are hanging about in the air out there.  

The Covid-15. It’s the extra 15 pounds you gain as you spend more time at home baking goodies, and cooking giant pots of pasta with cream sauces, and snacking on nachos while binge-watching the latest Netflix series. 

Doomsurfing. It’s like channel surfing or net-surfing, but instead of flipping from channel to channel or from website to website looking for something eye-catching, funny, or fascinating (like cats playing the piano), as you would have done in normal times, now you keep searching out the latest coronavirus statistics, looking to see if the curve is flattening or spiking. And you're finding and forwarding articles that purport to prove whatever theory you already believe to be true about the origins of the virus. You're reading celebrity obituaries. You're tweeting and retweeting corona-memes -- not even aware that all your friends and relatives have been deleting unread every catastro-piece you send them.  

Zoom. It’s now a noun, a verb, a gerund, an adjective, and the first half of any number of new compound words. Here’s a sampling of usages: “We haven’t zoomed today but we’ll catch up on our zooming over the weekend.” “My uncle’s pretty zoom-adept but my aunt is completely zoom-challenged.” “My zoom-dates have all been duds.” “If I reconnect with my ex, maybe we can become zoom-mates.” “He’s OK, I guess, and we’ll text each other from time to time – but he’s not really zoom-worthy.” And then there's this: “I’ve had two meetings that were zoom-bombed – one by my boss’s cat jumping down on his laptop and the other by my kid who made me look like I had devil horns."  

Covidiot. You know ‘em when you see ‘em. They’re the people who show up at mass gatherings, not wearing masks, and when interviewed by local news, say things like, “I’m not worried, I’ve got a strong immune system” and "I've got a right to go wherever I want." It's the guy who brushes by you on the narrow sidewalk, not giving you a chance to step aside, and he acts as if you have inconvenienced him. It’s the Facebook friend who posts conspiracy theories about the virus having been cooked up in a lab by [insert name place or cabal of people to be blamed]. In a case of poetic injustice, the covidiot never seems to get sick, unless you count their infection with “moronavirus.”  

Coronapocalypse or Coronageddon. Both call to mind the terms, “Snowpocalypse” or “Snowmageddon,” but while that strange interruption in Normal Life lasted just for just a few days in winter, this time it goes on and on and on…..and it really does feel like The End of the World as We Know It. We’ll all have to wait to see whether we can finish off the iconic song with those final words, “I feel fine.”    
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The Stay In! Column is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays.

Thursday, April 23, 2020

Stay In! Happy Friday….or wait, is it Thursday?


by Peggy Robin  

If you’re working from home, or you’ve been laid off, or you have rearranged your life to fit the shelter-in-place new world, it’s easy to lose the distinction between the weekend and the regular old Monday-to-Friday drill. But when you start losing track of the days of the work week, then you know you’re in trouble….a sensation that’s been perfectly summed up by a current internet meme:

The fuzziness of the days is not helped by reading the virtual Washington Post either. It’s the version that pops up on your computer, as opposed to the one that lands with a thud on your doorstep – or maybe in your bushes --wrapped up in an bright orange or dull gray plastic wrapper. Prime example of a WaPo time-slide was the recent story about how apartment dwellers are dealing with the news that someone in their building has tested positive for coronavirus. If you take your Post online, it was Monday, April 20 when you read about it. But if you get your WaPo in the form of black, smearable ink on newsprint, then you didn’t know a thing about it until you unfolded the paper on the morning of Wednesday, April 22, and saw the story on the front page. (I like using this article as my example, because it happens to be about a topic that was first discussed on the Cleveland Park Listserv way back on March 28 – and the Listserv was featured prominently as a source of some of the arguments described in the article.)  

If you’re confused by the strange flow of days, how are your children handling it? Do they miss their formerly timed-to-the-minute schedules? The lives of Cleveland Park children have long been reputed to be planned out like precision drills, each day packed with lessons, enrichment programs, sports practices, music lessons, play rehearsals, chess club, not to mention running up new records at Minecraft, while translating Japanese haiku in Latin, as they’re shuttled between activities in giant SUVs. Now that they’re no longer out of the house for seven to ten hours of the school day, how are they spending all that unruly, free-form time? Are they learning to flow with the circadian rhythms of nature? Or are they just getting squirrelly? Or do you wonder how this bizarre episode in history has filtered into their subconscious and will drive them in unknown ways for the rest of their lives?
 
You may not find out until one day, far into the future, your child writes what turns out the be the great American novel of Coronavirus era.

In the meantime, speaking of children and literature, here’s a repurposed children’s classic to produce a rueful smile of the day (which, by the way, is still Thursday):
“Alexander and the Day That Blended Into Every Other Day Like Some Kafkaesque Nightmare with No Merciful End In Sight”
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The “Stay In” column (formerly known as the “Get Out!” events column) is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays. Or is it Fridays?   

Thursday, April 16, 2020

Stay in: Avoid the Zoom of Gloom

by Peggy Robin

The “Stay In” (formerly known as “Get Out!”) column resumes with more tips for reaching out to others without the in-person touch we all knew and loved.

Instead, we must ZOOM. That’s the most popular way we’re meeting each other face-to-face these days – or face-to-faces, up to the number of people accepting invitations for a scheduled meeting in cyberspace.

Before you greet each other, you must each spend your first five or ten minutes establishing your connection, which means you let others will see you mouthing the words, “Can you hear me?” into the camera, while your own screen will show the others mouthing those same words back at you.

Once you all have figured out how to turn the audio on, you can spend another five or ten minutes yelling at each other to adjust your camera position, or adjust your heads, so that you can see more than George’s bald spot and view more than the left side of Norma’s face at the edge of the screen, or get Rudolf to stop showing you an extreme closeup of his red, red nose. Once you can see everyone and they can see you, then there’s one more round of sound checks from people who have suddenly lost the audio, or moved too far away from the microphone when backing up to stop giving you that extreme closeup of their nasal passages.

Is there any way to avoid this scenario? Maybe not entirely, but there are measures that everyone can take to make the Zoom time a little less gloomy. You – and everyone in your Zooming circle of friends – can help make things run faster and better if you will all just do your bit to prepare for the meeting. Just follow these simple steps:

1. Check your appearance. Before you even sit down in front of the computer, take a good look at yourself in the mirror. Is your hair combed? Check. Is there anything stuck between your teeth? Fix that now! Are you dressed decently? And  NOT just from the waist up! Why (you may ask), when no one’s going to see anything below the belt? HAH! You are NOT thinking ahead. You think you live in a world without hot coffee spills, or a cat that can brush by the lid of the laptop and suddenly change the camera view? Just about any flukey thing with a  thousand-to-one odds against its occurrence that could embarrass you on camera has already happened to someone else, someone who never thought through the possibilities. And consider this: Once you’ve been captured on Zoom leaping up from your chair and running out of the room half-naked, remember, there’s likely someone who’s captured that image and is ready to send it straight to YouTube, where it will forever live in infamy. YOUR infamy, that is.

2. Decide what screen view you prefer. You can choose to see all the participants (“gallery view”) or view the active speaker on full screen, or create
a customized view that will arrange the talking heads to your own satisfaction. Learn what your screen view option are here:  https://bit.ly/2XGus7P -- and how to change them. For other helpful tutorials in Zoom, go to: https://support.zoom.us/hc/en-us/articles/206618765-Zoom-Video-Tutorials. Zoom videos are short (most are no more than a minute or two) and to the point. I particularly 
found the “Start a test meeting” exercise to be 
most helpful: https://support.zoom.us/hc/en-us/articles/115002262083-Joining-a-test-meeting

3.  Prepare your instruments ahead of time. Open up Zoom BEFORE the designated appointment time. Do the audio check. Next, test your video. Adjust your screen view. Let your fellow meeting participants know in advance that they’re supposed to make their own preparations ahead of time, too. If you are the person in charge of the meeting, you can send out gentle reminders well before the meeting starts. But don’t get overly optimistic. There’s bound to be one or two who’ll claim they never got the memo. Or if they got it, they never read it. Or if they read it, they didn’t understand the instructions. So, in all likelihood, you will still need to waste some time at the start of the meeting as they fiddle with the audio and adjust their screen views. But at least it won’t be on you!

4. Don’t eat or drink during your Zoom meeting. See above for the hot coffee spill scenario. What about a glass of water? By all means, stay hydrated – BEFORE the meeting. Bring your glass of water into your Zoom meeting only if you are wearing a wet suit and your computer is secure inside an Otterbox® case.

5. Consider what’s in the background. If it’s a bookcase, remember, people WILL read the titles on the spines and comment on your taste in literature. Better take down that framed, autographed, 1990 Baywatch poster from the wall behind you! Remove anything visible you’d rather not be judged for owning. Or you can use the “Virtual Background” feature in Zoom to make it look like you live in a 18th Century salon in a chateau on the Loire. Or you’re Zooming in from the deck of your villa on a Caribbean island. Go to: https://support.zoom.us/hc/en-us/articles/210707503-Virtual-Background for instructions on how to rid yourself of the real-life clutter behind you and replace it with the most sumptuous setting you can download for free. Or better still, make it appear as if you are living in squalor and clearly need a raise.

6. Think about your privacy. You’ve probably read that Zoom has some troublesome security flaws. If you not up on that, you can read about it in the Washington Post:  Zoom meetings have been hacked, and in some cases the intruders have insulted or even terrorized the participants. Now, that’s not about to happen to you unless you are already a person with some serious enemies. The armies of trolls out there aren’t interested in breaking up your online bridge game. Nor is anyone going to hack into your book club's discussion of “Sense and Sensibility.” Or steal your Snickerdoodle recipe just as you are revealing what secret spice you knead into the cookie dough. Still, you are wise not to do or say anything over Zoom that might be considered confidential or easily misconstrued, if made public. You’re on Zoom – and by definition you’re on the internet. So smile for the camera and posterity. And save your innermost thoughts for the diary you keep locked and hidden away under the mattress.

To finish out this column, I was planning to include links to some of the funniest Zoom “fails” – those weird and awkward things people have been caught doing on Zoom. You know -- stuff like, the toddler who wanders into the room, proudly shouting, “Mommy, I made the biggest poopie in the potty!” Or the husband, wrapped only in a towel, dashing down the hallway to the bathroom. But in every compilation of “Zoom Fails” I looked at, there was always at least one scene that was too humiliating or too gross to be funny. More things cringe-worthy than cute. And we have more than enough to groan about as it is.

To remove the gloom from our Zoom, try a symphony instead -- the "Ode to Joy" from the socially distant Bamburger Symphony -- or better still, a choir singing "Somewhere over the Rainbow. But if I could, I would tweak one of the lyrics just a bit: One day I’ll wish upon a star and wake up where the Covid’s far behind me….”
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The ”Stay In” non-events column is published on the Cleveland Park Listserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays.   

Thursday, April 9, 2020

Stay In! (Formerly the "Get Out" Column): Be Your Own Tech Guru

Photo by Sebastian Ahl (Wikimedia Commons)
by Peggy Robin

The weekly “Get Out” column is back to its quarantined incarnation as the “Stay In” column….and since we’re all utterly dependent on our computers and other internet-enabled devices to keep in touch with one another while maintaining social distance, the point of this column is to show you how to become your own tech consultant and keep your communications humming along throughout the emergency.

Here's the very first skill you need to master. As soon as you notice anything amiss with your computer, you need to learn to say to yourself, in a highly exasperated tone, while simultaneously rolling your eyes, “Have you rebooted yet?” You can do that, right? Great, now you sound exactly like your company’s smirking little IT guy – you know, that kid who comes around to check your computer at the office, who looks to be all of 15.

Actually, I have a couple of practical tips for things you can do even before you remember to try a reboot. First of all, check all the connections to ports, hubs, and plugs. Cables and wires do get dislodged and that can be the simplest explanation for something not working. A quick crawl under a dusty desk to push in a loose plug may be the only technical fix you need. Second, if you’ve been running your laptop on battery power, try it with the power cord. You may think that can't possibly be the problem because you never saw a “low-batt” warning – but maybe you just overlooked it, or it could be there there was something going on with the program that you were using that prevented the low-batt warning from showing up. Anyway, don’t worry about it; just let your device recharge for a while. It never hurts to try. 

OK, so it’s not a low-batt problem, and everything’s plugged in properly, and you’ve rebooted and that didn’t help. Your next step is the old JFGI. (This is a family column so I will translate that to "Just Flaming Google It"). You can type in normal sentence format whatever's gone wrong -- e.g., my mouse pointer has disappeared -- and at the speed of whizzing electrons Google’s search engine will go over all the millions of times people have typed in this same problem and others have answered it, displaying the thousands of  results in order of most to least relevant. Some of the best answers will include links to YouTube videos that show you the screenshots of what you will see as you go step-by-step to fix the problem.

Still need help? Next, try the free tech support available from the company that makes the device or program on the fritz. (Careful now! You want to make sure you are contacting the legitimate tech support site, not a fake look-alike site. Use only the contact information you were provided for the company at time of purchase or when you registered the device. Never click on a toll-free number or anyplace advertised on the web as a free computer help site, as the odds are very high it's run by scammers and malware-makers.) Don't worry that your device may be long out of warranty. At many companies, the service reps will do their best to help an old, loyal customer, years after the original sale. I've called Epson about an eight year old printer that had become fuzzy, and they walked me through a more advanced print-head+nozzle-cleaning process than the one described in the manual. And it worked!  

Now if you're still stuck with your balky computer or mobile device, even after 20 minutes on the phone with a company rep, and after watching YouTube how-to videos out the wazoo, and you've tried all the other DIY steps I've mentioned, OK, go ahead and pay someone to rescue you. Who you gonna call? That's where the Cleveland Park Listserv comes in. The archives are a storehouse of recommendations of tech gurus (among other types of helpers) that your neighbors have used and will vouch for. Don't know how to search? You can find instructions here: http://www.cleveland-park.com/searching-the-archives.html.Worried about a house call in the present emergency? Most computer help can be done remotely, through use of a program that allow the tech guru to see exactly what you see on your computer screen, and get into the works to diagnose the problem and fix it. And neither of you has to leave the comfort and safety of home. Bonus: with this kind of remote control help, you will never have to see the tech guru rolling their eyes at you!

Needless to say, I hope it doesn't come to that. I wish you  and your computer the best of health -- and may you both be free of viruses! 

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The "Stay In" column is published on the Cleveland ParkListserv and on All Life Is Local on Thursdays.